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Amethyst/Brain/Infobot/Module/Excuse.pm  view on Meta::CPAN

Lusers learning curve appears to be fractal
We had to turn off that service to comply with the CDA Bill.
Ionisation from the air-conditioning
TCP/IP UDP alarm threshold is set too low.
Someone is broadcasting pigmy packets and the router dosn't know how to deal with them.
The new frame relay network hasn't bedded down the software loop transmitter yet. 
Fanout dropping voltage too much, try cutting some of those little traces
Plate voltage too low on demodulator tube
You did wha... oh _dear_....
CPU needs bearings repacked
Too many little pins on CPU confusing it, bend back and forth until 10-20% are neatly removed. Do _not_ leave metal bits visible!
_Rosin_ core solder? But...
Software uses US measurements, but the OS is in metric...
The computer fletely, mouse and all.
Your cat tried to eat the mouse.
The Borg tried to assimilate your system. Resistance is futile.
It must have been the lightning storm we had (yesterdy) (last week) (last month)
Due to Federal Budget problems we have been forced to cut back on the number of users able to access the system at one time. (namely none allowed....)
Too much radiation coming from the soil.
Unfortunately we have run out of bits/bytes/whatever. Don't worry, the next supply will be coming next week.
Program load too heavy for processor to lift.

factpacks/Linux.fact  view on Meta::CPAN

most => <reply> $who, Browse or page through a text file. URL: ftp://space.mit.edu/pub/davis/most/
MotifCamedia => <reply> $who, Camera iamges download program. URL: http://home.t-online.de/home/jodda/camedia.htm
Zsid => <reply> $who, Zsid, a C64 music player. URL: http://www.cpt.univ-mrs.fr/~penne/Zsid
mount.app => <reply> $who, Window Maker dock app for managing storage devices. URL: http://mountapp.netpedia.net
move_imap_users => <reply> $who, move users on cyrus imap server and load balancing. URL: http://www.squeegy.org/programs/
Moxy => <reply> $who, Linear video edtior, much like Adobe Premiere. URL: http://millennium.diads.com/moxy/
Mozart => <reply> $who, Browser-based contact and case/project manager. URL: http://www.virtual-attorney.com/mozart/
Mozart (Oz) => <reply> $who, Development platform for constraint and distributed applications. URL: http://www.mozart-oz.org
Mozilla => <reply> $who, Webbrowser for X11 derived from Netscape Communicator. URL: http://www.mozilla.org/
Mp3 Commander => <reply> $who, A tool to search and play mp3 collections and generate playlists. URL: http://www.digitallabyrinth.com/linux/mp3commander/
MP3 encode scripts => <reply> $who, Example scripts for batch encoding and converting an entire CD to MP3 files. URL: http://hive.me.gu.edu.au/not_lame/
MP3 Requester => <reply> $who, php / mysql requesting front end to shout ( icecast ). URL: http://radio.ammiinc.com
MP3 Server Box => <reply> $who, MP3 Player that can be controlled over network. URL: http://igalaxie.com/ltt/mp3/
MP3-Studio => <reply> $who, Integrated enviroment for playing and recording MP3-files. URL: http://mp3.nederland.net/
mp3.app => <reply> $who, . URL: http://global.uibk.ac.at/~fatal/mp3-app/
Mp32SQL => <reply> $who, Searches for mp3 files and adds them to an SQL database. URL: http://wrm.grdn.net/mp32sql/
mp3agent => <reply> $who, Automatic search and retrieval for mp3 files. URL: http://www.digitallabyrinth.com/linux/mp3agent/index.html
mp3album.pl => <reply> $who, MP3 Album list generator in Perl. URL: http://zeus.informatik.uni-frankfurt.de/~corion/
mp3blaster => <reply> $who, Provides interactive playing of mp3 files on a text console. URL: http://www.stack.nl/~brama/mp3blaster.html
MP3c => <reply> $who, Audio-CD to MP3-Converter, with use of CDDB. URL: http://excelsior.kullen.rwth-aachen.de/WSPse/Linux-MP3c.php3
mp3d => <reply> $who, Client-server MP3-player. URL: http://student.fho-emden.de/~hhaak/progs.html

factpacks/Linux.fact  view on Meta::CPAN

WhoiShOstFast => <reply> $who, WhoiShOstFast is multi-process TCP port scanner.. URL: http://web.interpuntonet.it/zerophobia/sources.html
mod_pcgi2 => <reply> $who, mod_pcgi2 is a module for Apache to handle PersistentCGI protocol. URL: http://www.zope.org/Members/phd/mod_pcgi2/mod_pcgi2.tar.gz
C-XSC++ => <reply> $who, C-XSC++ is a C++ class library for eXtended Scientific Computing. URL: http://www.uni-karlsruhe.de/~uad3/cxsc/
PHP firewall generator => <reply> $who, The PHP firewall generator is a simple PHP script that generates a firewall script for ipchains-based firewalls. URL: http://www.babel.com.au/phpfwgen/phpfwgen-0.1.tar.gz
Adobe Framemaker => <reply> $who, Framemaker is widely used in the technical publishing field to create and manage complex documents. URL: ftp://ftp.adobe.com/pub/adobe/magic/framemaker/unix/5.x/beta/fmlinux.tar.gz
Webtasker => <reply> $who, WebTasker is a simple Web application to manage tasks in a work group. URL: http://www.centrored.com/centroredWWW/webtasker/webtasker1.0.tgz
cacheprof => <reply> $who, Cacheprof is a tool for quantifying and understanding the data cache behaviour of programs. URL: http://www.cacheprof.org/
nethack-cow => <reply> $who, nethack-cow is a small and simple patch to NetHack 3.3.0 to include a new monster (cows, which occasionally show up in 'cowhives').. URL: http://www.goldinc.com/~shammack/nethack-cow.diff.gz
DHTML Dynamic Headline Fader => <reply> $who, The dynamic headline fader/flipper display is a highly configurable DHTML gizmo, compatible with all DHTML-capable browsers (such as Netscape 4.x or IE 4.x). URL: http://webreference.com/dhtml/column27/fa...
ZZplayer => <reply> $who, Zplayer is a MPEG-I video player for the KDE environement, based on the SMPEG library. URL: ftp://ftp.kde.org/pub/kde/unstable/apps/multimedia/video/zzplayer-0.2.tar.gz
NotLame MP3 encoder => <reply> $who, NotLame is the resultant executable after applying the LAME patch to ISO source code, compiled without GTK frame analyzer support.. URL: http://hive.me.gu.edu.au/not_lame/notlame350_rh6.tgz
xraw => <reply> $who, xraw is a development kit for creating games, demos, and intros under Linux and derivatives. URL: http://www.informatik.fh-wiesbaden.de/~i656/xraw-12081999.tgz
SocratEase => <reply> $who, SocratEase is a web-based training package with everything needed to build, deliver and track online courses. URL: http://www.SocratEase.com/downloads/trial/
SquirrelMail => <reply> $who, SquirrelMail is a PHP4-based Web email client. URL: http://squirrelmail.sourceforge.net/index.php3?page=5
WebEvent Calendar => <reply> $who, WebEvent is a Web-based calendar and scheduling program. URL: http://www.WebEvent.com/cgi-bin/download.cgi
gps3d => <reply> $who, gps is a set of utilities that lets you manipulate your GPS from your Linux box. URL: http://www.mgix.com/gps3d/gps3d-1.1.tar.bz2
jString => <reply> $who, jString is a class for C++ that extends basic string functionality. URL: http://simple.dhs.org/src/jString/jString-0.1.tar.gz
NatesWinEmu => <reply> $who, In the spirit of GTKTrue, NatesWinEmu is a Windows Emulator for Linux. URL: http://www.udlug.org/~nate/NatesWinEmu.c
GtkExtra => <reply> $who, GTKExtra is a useful set of widgets for creating GUIs for the X Window System using GTK+. URL: http://magnet.fsu.edu/~feiguin/gtk/download.html
Demolization => <reply> $who, Demolization is a strategy game which is a cross between Sid Meier's Civilization and Risk. URL: http://demolization.sourceforge.net/downloads.html
GMCAL => <reply> $who, GMCAL is a GTK+ frontend for the libmcal package.. URL: http://mcal.chek.com/download.php3