App-Relate-Complex

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Youth of today!  Join me in a mass rally for traditional mental attitudes!

Earlier you said nose would like to have this bad ronald?

I just had my entire INTESTINAL TRACT coated with TEFLON!

Possibly any hobbies you have are related to this.

You should all JUMP UP AND DOWN for TWO HOURS while I decide
 on a NEW CAREER!!

What happened when you decide on a new career?

I like the IMPUDENT NOSE on that car..  Are you a TEEN-AGER?  

Is it because of your sex life that you say are me a teen ager?

You mean now I can SHOOT YOU in the back and further BLUR
 th' distinction between FANTASY and REALITY?

You mentioned that you are out of your mind?

I'm also pre-POURED pre-MEDITATED and pre-RAPHAELITE!!

Is it because of hangups you have that you are going through all
this?

Yow!  Are we laid back yet?

Why do you say are you laid back yet?

I'm having a RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE..  and I don't take any DRUGS

What makes you believe bendix would like to have this god?

- if it GLISTENS, gobble it!!

How do you reconcile your inhibitions?

Is it clean in other dimensions?

Is it because of some problems in your childhood that you say is
it clean in other dimensions?

After this, I'm going to BURN some RUBBER!!

Earlier you said you have your apple '' you comprehend cost
accounting?

I'd like some JUNK FOOD...  and then I want to be ALONE --

Why should I give to be alone to you?

Now I'm having INSIPID THOUGHTS about the beautiful, round
 wives of HOLLYWOOD MOVIE MOGULS encased in PLEXIGLASS CARS
 and being approached by SMALL BOYS selling FRUIT..

Maybe this could be the reason for some problems at home?

It's a lot of fun being alive...  I wonder if my bed is made?!?

Are you sure that you wonder if your bed is made?

Here we are in America...  when do we collect unemployment?

What would happen if do you collect unemployment?

Are we THERE yet?

You mentioned that by 1993 everyone will live in and around las
vegas and wear beatle haircuts?

I don't know WHY I said that..  I think it came from the FILLINGS
 in my rear molars..

Perhaps your plans could have caused this.

I'm wet!  I'm wild!

Is it because of your life that you say you are wild?

Did an Italian CRANE OPERATOR just experience uninhibited sensations
 in a MALIBU HOT TUB?

Do you really think do I know what it means to be truly one with
my booth?

Did I say I was a sardine?  Or a bus???

Is it because of the people you hang around with that you are
going through all this?

But was he mature enough last night at the lesbian masquerade?

Are you annoyed that was he mature enough last night at the
lesbian masquerade?

There's a SALE on STRETCH SOCKS down at the "7-11"!!

How do you reconcile problems at school?

YOW!!  I'm in a very clever and adorable INSANE ASYLUM!!

Earlier you said you used hash?

Are we THERE yet?  My MIND is a SUBMARINE!!

Possibly this is caused by any hobbies you have?

Now, my ENTIRE LIFE is flashing before my EYES as I park my DODGE
 DART in your EXXON service area for a COMPLETE LUBRICATION!!

Have you been afraid of that?

I OWN six pink HIPPOS!!

You mentioned that it would like to be potato?

Why don't you ever enter any CONTESTS, Marvin??
 Don't you know your own ZIPCODE?

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Youth of today!  Join me in a mass rally for traditional mental attitudes!

Earlier you said nose would like to have this bad ronald?

I just had my entire INTESTINAL TRACT coated with TEFLON!

Possibly any hobbies you have are related to this.

You should all JUMP UP AND DOWN for TWO HOURS while I decide
 on a NEW CAREER!!

What happened when you decide on a new career?

I like the IMPUDENT NOSE on that car..  Are you a TEEN-AGER?  

Is it because of your sex life that you say are me a teen ager?

You mean now I can SHOOT YOU in the back and further BLUR
 th' distinction between FANTASY and REALITY?

You mentioned that you are out of your mind?

I'm also pre-POURED pre-MEDITATED and pre-RAPHAELITE!!

Is it because of hangups you have that you are going through all
this?

Yow!  Are we laid back yet?

Why do you say are you laid back yet?

I'm having a RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE..  and I don't take any DRUGS

What makes you believe bendix would like to have this god?

- if it GLISTENS, gobble it!!

How do you reconcile your inhibitions?

Is it clean in other dimensions?

Is it because of some problems in your childhood that you say is
it clean in other dimensions?

After this, I'm going to BURN some RUBBER!!

Earlier you said you have your apple '' you comprehend cost
accounting?

I'd like some JUNK FOOD...  and then I want to be ALONE --

Why should I give to be alone to you?

Now I'm having INSIPID THOUGHTS about the beautiful, round
 wives of HOLLYWOOD MOVIE MOGULS encased in PLEXIGLASS CARS
 and being approached by SMALL BOYS selling FRUIT..

Maybe this could be the reason for some problems at home?

It's a lot of fun being alive...  I wonder if my bed is made?!?

Are you sure that you wonder if your bed is made?

Here we are in America...  when do we collect unemployment?

What would happen if do you collect unemployment?

Are we THERE yet?

You mentioned that by 1993 everyone will live in and around las
vegas and wear beatle haircuts?

I don't know WHY I said that..  I think it came from the FILLINGS
 in my rear molars..

Perhaps your plans could have caused this.

I'm wet!  I'm wild!

Is it because of your life that you say you are wild?

Did an Italian CRANE OPERATOR just experience uninhibited sensations
 in a MALIBU HOT TUB?

Do you really think do I know what it means to be truly one with
my booth?

Did I say I was a sardine?  Or a bus???

Is it because of the people you hang around with that you are
going through all this?

But was he mature enough last night at the lesbian masquerade?

Are you annoyed that was he mature enough last night at the
lesbian masquerade?

There's a SALE on STRETCH SOCKS down at the "7-11"!!

How do you reconcile problems at school?

YOW!!  I'm in a very clever and adorable INSANE ASYLUM!!

Earlier you said you used hash?

Are we THERE yet?  My MIND is a SUBMARINE!!

Possibly this is caused by any hobbies you have?

Now, my ENTIRE LIFE is flashing before my EYES as I park my DODGE
 DART in your EXXON service area for a COMPLETE LUBRICATION!!

Have you been afraid of that?

I OWN six pink HIPPOS!!

You mentioned that it would like to be potato?

Why don't you ever enter any CONTESTS, Marvin??
 Don't you know your own ZIPCODE?

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It's so OBVIOUS!!

Earlier you said was you born?

Is this "BIKINI BEACH"?

Is it because of the people you hang around with that you are
going through all this?

..  I want to perform cranial activities with Tuesday Weld!!

How does it feel to want?

I joined scientology at a garage sale!!

Do you really think you joined scientology at a garage sale?

I'll eat ANYTHING that's BRIGHT BLUE!!

You mentioned that cannot even be printed?

Yow!  Maybe I should have asked for my Neutron Bomb in PAISLEY--

How do you reconcile problems at school?

What a COINCIDENCE!  I'm an authorized ``SNOOTS OF THE STARS'' dealer!!

I don't understand.

O.K.!  Speak with a PHILADELPHIA ACCENT!!  Send out for CHINESE FOOD!!
 Hop a JET!

What makes you think you own them?

Is this ANYWHERE, USA?

Possibly this could be the reason for any hobbies you have?

Are you guys lined up for the METHADONE PROGRAM or FOOD STAMPS??

Maybe your sex life could be the reason for this.

Have my two-tone, 1958 Nash METRO brought around..

Earlier you said you would like to empty?

Pardon me, but do you know what it means to be TRULY ONE
 with your BOOTH!

Is the fact that do I know what it means to be truly one with my
booth the real reason?

I just had a MAJOR CONTRACT DISPUTE with SUZANNE SOMERS!!

Is it because of hangups you have that you are going through all
this?

It's strange, but I'm only TRULY ALIVE when I'm covered in POLKA DOTS
 and TACO SAUCE...

Does the fact that you are only truly alive when you are covered
in polka dots and taco sauce explain anything else?

Uh-oh!!  I'm having TOO MUCH FUN!!

Is it because of your inhibitions that you say you are having too
much fun?

I can't think about that.  It doesn't go with HEDGES in the shape of
 LITTLE LULU -- or ROBOTS making BRICKS...

You mentioned that was you born?

I'm pretending that we're all watching PHIL SILVERS
 instead of RICARDO MONTALBAN!

Have you been sure we're all watching phil silvers instead of
ricardo montalban?

Four thousand different MAGNATES, MOGULS & NABOBS are romping in my
 gothic solarium!!

How do you reconcile some problems in your childhood?

I just forgot my whole philosophy of life!!!

Why do you say you just forgot your whole philosophy of life?

Do I hear th' SPINNING of various WHIRRING, ROUND, and WARM
 WHIRLOMATICS?!

What makes you believe you would like to perform?

Finally, Zippy drives his 1958 RAMBLER METROPOLITAN into the
 faculty dining room.

Yow!  Are we interactive yet?

I am having a pleasant time!!

Perhaps this is caused by some problems at home?

I'm having a BIG BANG THEORY!!

Is it because of your plans that you say you are having a big
bang theory?

..Am I in a SOAP OPERA??

Earlier you said cannot even be printed?

I Know A Joke

Possibly your life are caused by this.

Alright, you!!  Imitate a WOUNDED SEAL pleading for a PARKING SPACE!!

Are you scared of that?

I put aside my copy of ``BOWLING WORLD'' and think
 about GUN CONTROL legislation..

You mentioned that you own them?

WHOA!!  I'm having a RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE right NOW!!

Is it because of the people you hang around with that you are
going through all this?

How's it going in those MODULAR LOVE UNITS??

Are you sorry modular loves someone?

Four thousand different MAGNATES, MOGULS & NABOBS are romping in my
 gothic solarium!!

Are you sure that that?

BARBARA STANWYCK makes me nervous!!

Do you really think you would like to empty?

When I met th'POPE back in '58, I scrubbed him with a MILD SOAP
 or DETERGENT for 15 minutes.  He seemed to enjoy it..

How do you reconcile problems at school?

I have no actual hairline...

What makes you think you have no actual hairline?

NOT fucking!! Also not a PACKAGE of LOOSE-LEAF PAPER!!

Tell me about something about your sexual history.

I'm in direct contact with many advanced fun CONCEPTS.

Earlier you said do I know what it means to be truly one with my
booth?

My life is a patio of fun!

Maybe this is because of any hobbies you have?

Should I start with the time I SWITCHED personalities with a BEATNIK
 hair stylist or my failure to refer five TEENAGERS to a good OCULIST?

I don't understand.

Actually, what I'd like is a little toy spaceship!!

You mentioned that you are only truly alive when you are covered
in polka dots and taco sauce?

Make me look like LINDA RONSTADT again!!

Perhaps your sex life are because of this.

With this weapon I can expose fictional characters and bring about
 sweeping reforms!!

Is it because of hangups you have that you are going through all
this?

YUGGA-HUGGA-BUGGA-TUGGA!!  HEY-HEY!!  A TRAIN STATION!!  No, a POST
 OFFICE!!  An OCEAN LINER!!  No, I think it's a CAFETERIA!!!

Why do you say was you born?

I guess it was all a DREAM..  or an episode of HAWAII FIVE-O...

How do you reconcile your inhibitions?

Place me on a BUFFER counter while you BELITTLE several BELLHOPS
 in the Trianon Room!!  Let me one of your SUBSIDIARIES!

Is it because of some problems in your childhood that you say let
you one of my subsidiaries?

I pretend I'm living in a styrofoam packing crate, high in th'
 SWISS ALPS, still unable to accept th' idea of TOUCH-TONE DIALING!!

Do you get high often?

Look!!  Karl Malden!

Earlier you said we're all watching phil silvers instead of
ricardo montalban?

I just remembered something about a TOAD!

Possibly this has something to do with some problems at home?

- if it GLISTENS, gobble it!!

What makes you believe - if it glistens gobble it?

..  I wonder if I ought to tell them about my PREVIOUS LIFE
 as a COMPLETE STRANGER?

You mentioned that you would like to perform?

RHAPSODY in Glue!

Maybe your plans have something to do with this.

Yow!  Now I get to think about all the BAD THINGS I did to a BOWLING BALL
 when I was in JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL!

Talk about your school.

These PRESERVES should be FORCE-FED to PENTAGON OFFICIALS!!

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When you get your PH.D. will you get able to work at BURGER KING?

What happened when I get my ph d will I get able to work at
burger king?

Those aren't WINOS--that's my JUGGLER, my AERIALIST,
 my SWORD SWALLOWER, and my LATEX NOVELTY SUPPLIER!!

How do you reconcile problems at school?

Eisenhower!!  Your mimeograph machine upsets my stomach!!

You have your mind on machines, it seems.

Someone is DROOLING on my collar!!

Do you really think someone is drooling on your collar?

I brought my BOWLING BALL - and some DRUGS!!

You mentioned that you would like to empty?

Yow!

Have you been Zippy?

Oh my GOD -- the SUN just fell into YANKEE STADIUM!!

Perhaps this is related to any hobbies you have?

..  My vaseline is RUNNING...

Is it because of your sex life that you say your vaseline is
running?

By MEER biz doo SCHOIN..

What makes you think do I know what it means to be truly one with
my booth?

NOT fucking!! Also not a PACKAGE of LOOSE-LEAF PAPER!!

I would appreciate it if you would discuss your sex life...

I'm continually AMAZED at th'breathtaking effects of WIND EROSION!!

Possibly hangups you have are related to this.

Why are these athletic shoe salesmen following me??

Is it because are these athletic shoe salesmen following you that
you came to me?

Didn't I buy a 1951 Packard from you last March in Cairo?

Why do you say that?

Yow!  I want my nose in lights!

Earlier you said you are only truly alive when you are covered in
polka dots and taco sauce?

-- In 1962, you could buy a pair of SHARKSKIN SLACKS, with a
 ``Continental Belt,'' for $10.99!!

Is it because of your inhibitions that you are going through all
this?

Bo Derek ruined my life!

What makes you believe bo derek ruined your life?

A can of ASPARAGUS, 73 pigeons, some LIVE ammo, and a FROZEN DAQUIRI!!

You mentioned that was you born?

Join the PLUMBER'S UNION!!

How do you reconcile some problems in your childhood?

BARRY..  That was the most HEART-WARMING rendition of
 ``I DID IT MY WAY'' I've ever heard!!

Are you satisfied with the fact that was the most heart warming
rendition of you did it your way'' you have ever heard?

You were s'posed to laugh!

Is it because of some problems at home that you say I was s'posed
to laugh?

If a person is FAMOUS in this country, they have to go on the ROAD
 for MONTHS at a time and have their name misspelled on the SIDE
 of a GREYHOUND SCENICRUISER!!

Are you sure that you were high?

Hey, I LIKE that POINT!!

Maybe this could be the reason for your plans?

OVER the undertow!  UNDER the overpass!  Around the FUTURE
 and BEYOND REPAIR!!

Do you really think around the future and beyond repair?

Kids, the seven basic food groups are GUM, PUFF PASTRY, PIZZA,
 PESTICIDES, ANTIBIOTICS, NUTRA-SWEET and MILK DUDS!!

Earlier you said we're all watching phil silvers instead of
ricardo montalban?

Somewhere in Tenafly, New Jersey, a chiropractor is viewing
 ``Leave it to Beaver''!

Perhaps your life could have caused this.

Two LITTLE black dots and one BIG black dot...nice 'n' FLUFFY!!

I don't understand.

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 overbite....Needs REDDY-WHIP!!

Why do you say that?

I'm having a MID-WEEK CRISIS!

You mentioned that you would like to empty?

QUIET!!  I'm being CREATIVE!!  Is it GREAT yet?  It's s'posed to
 SMOKEY THE BEAR...

Is it because of hangups you have that you are going through all
this?

YOW!!  I'm in a very clever and adorable INSANE ASYLUM!!

I don't understand.

Let's go to CHURCH!

What makes you believe do I know what it means to be truly one
with my booth?

Our father who art in heaven..  I sincerely pray that SOMEBODY
 at this table will PAY for my SHREDDED WHAT and ENGLISH MUFFIN..
 and also leave a GENEROUS TIP...

How do you reconcile your inhibitions?

Tex SEX!  The HOME of WHEELS!  The dripping of COFFEE!!  Take me
 to Minnesota but don't EMBARRASS me!!

When did you first know that do not embarrass you?

I think I am an overnight sensation right now!!

Perhaps this is because of some problems in your childhood?

I Know A Joke

Earlier you said are these athletic shoe salesmen following you?

Where's my SOCIAL WORKER?

Possibly some problems at home are caused by this.

Talking Pinhead Blues:
 Oh, I LOST my ``HELLO KITTY'' DOLL and I get BAD reception on
  channel TWENTY-SIX!!
 Th'HOSTESS FACTORY is closin' down and I just heard ZASU PITTS
  has been DEAD for YEARS..  (sniff)
 My PLATFORM SHOE collection was CHEWED up by th'dog, ALEXANDER
  HAIG won't let me take a SHOWER 'til Easter.. (snurf)
 So I went to the kitchen, but WALNUT PANELING whup me
  upside mah HAID!! (on no, no, no..  Heh, heh)

Is it because of your plans that you say heh heh?

Hold the MAYO & pass the COSMIC AWARENESS...

You mentioned that you are only truly alive when you are covered
in polka dots and taco sauce?

Somewhere in DOWNTOWN BURBANK a prostitute is OVERCOOKING a LAMB CHOP!!

Tell me more about your feelings about your sexual partner.

I'm rated PG-34!!

Is it because of your life that you are going through all this?

Gibble, Gobble, we ACCEPT YOU ---

Are you sure that gibble gobble you accept me?

Why is everything made of Lycra Spandex?

Is the fact that is everything made of lycra spandex the real
reason?

..I just walked into th' HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES with fourteen WET
 DOLPHINS and an out-of-date MARRIAGE MANUAL...

Do you really think was you born?

Look!  A ladder!  Maybe it leads to heaven, or a sandwich!

How do you reconcile the people you hang around with?

Are you mentally here at Pizza Hut??

Is it because of problems at school that you say are me mentally
there at pizza hut?

CHUBBY CHECKER owns my BUILDING!

Earlier you said was the most heart warming rendition of you did
it your way'' you have ever heard?

And furthermore, my bowling average is unimpeachable!!!

Maybe this has something to do with any hobbies you have?

INSIDE, I have the same personality disorder as LUCY RICARDO!!

Have you been scared of that?

This PORCUPINE knows his ZIPCODE..  And he has ``VISA''!!

You mentioned that you were high?

Send your questions to ``ASK ZIPPY'', Box 40474,
 San Francisco, CA 94140, USA

Perhaps your sex life are because of this.

This is my WILLIAM BENDIX memorial CORNER where I worship William
 Bendix like a GOD!!

Why should bendix get to have this god?

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Is it because of the people you hang around with that you are
going through all this?

NOW do I get to blow out the CANDLES??

I don't understand.

Yow!  Now we can become alcoholics!

You mentioned that do I know what it means to be truly one with
my booth?

Life is selling REVOLUTIONARY HAIR PRODUCTS!

How do you reconcile problems at school?

YOW!!

I believe you have some serious inhibitions.

Civilization is fun!  Anyway, it keeps me busy!!

Does it bother you that it keeps you busy?

I am deeply CONCERNED and I want something GOOD for BREAKFAST!

Perhaps this could be the reason for any hobbies you have?

..  Should I get locked in the PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE today --
 or have a VASECTOMY??

What makes you think do not embarrass you?

I'm having fun HITCHHIKING to CINCINNATI or FAR ROCKAWAY!!

Possibly your sex life are related to this.

I was making donuts and now I'm on a bus!

Are you afraid of that?

Now I'm being INVOLUNTARILY shuffled closer to the CLAM DIP
 with the BROKEN PLASTIC FORKS in it!!

Earlier you said are these athletic shoe salesmen following you?

I decided to be JOHN TRAVOLTA instead!!

Is it because of hangups you have that you are going through all
this?

And furthermore, my bowling average is unimpeachable!!!

Why do you say and furthermore your bowling average is
unimpeachable?

Is a tattoo real, like a curb or a battleship?
 Or are we suffering in Safeway?

You mentioned that you are only truly alive when you are covered
in polka dots and taco sauce?

HOW could a GLASS be YELLING??

When did you first know that could a glass be yelling?

QUIET!!  I'm being CREATIVE!!  Is it GREAT yet?  It's s'posed to
 SMOKEY THE BEAR...

How do you reconcile your inhibitions?

..  I think I'd better go back to my DESK and toy with
 a few common MISAPPREHENSIONS...

What makes you believe that?

BELA LUGOSI is my co-pilot..

Are you sure that is everything made of lycra spandex?

WHO sees a BEACH BUNNY sobbing on a SHAG RUG?!

Maybe this is caused by some problems in your childhood?

Somewhere in suburban Honolulu, an unemployed bellhop is whipping up
 a batch of illegal psilocybin chop suey!!

I don't understand.

There's enough money here to buy 5000 cans of Noodle-Roni!

Earlier you said was you born?

It's OKAY --- I'm an INTELLECTUAL, too.

Perhaps some problems at home could have caused this.

Somewhere in DOWNTOWN BURBANK a prostitute is OVERCOOKING a LAMB CHOP!!

Elaborate on your most vivid sexual experience.

KARL MALDEN'S NOSE just won an ACADEMY AWARD!!

Is it because of your plans that you say karl malden's nose just
won an academy award?

It's 74 degrees, 12 minutes NORTH, and 41 degrees, 3 minutes EAST!!
 Soon, it will be TUESDAY!!

You mentioned that was the most heart warming rendition of you
did it your way'' you have ever heard?

I'm ZIPPY!!  Are we having FUN yet??

Is it because of your life that you are going through all this?

I'm receiving a coded message from EUBIE BLAKE!!

How do you reconcile the people you hang around with?

t/dat/tree/subdir/#groovy.txt#  view on Meta::CPAN

 SMOKEY THE BEAR...

What makes you think it's s'posed to smokey the bear?

I just bought FLATBUSH from MICKEY MANTLE!

You mentioned that comes just before I see the total at the
safeway checkout counter?

It's OBVIOUS..  The FURS never reached ISTANBUL..  You were
 an EXTRA in the REMAKE of ``TOPKAPI''..  Go home to your
 WIFE..  She's making FRENCH TOAST!

Maybe this is related to any hobbies you have?

Look!  A ladder!  Maybe it leads to heaven, or a sandwich!

Is it because of your sex life that you say maybe it leads to
heaven or a sandwich?

This is PLEASANT!

Why do you say could a glass be yelling?

Who wants some OYSTERS with SEN-SEN an' COOL WHIP?

Perhaps hangups you have are because of this.

I just got my PRINCE bumper sticker..
 But now I can't remember WHO he is...

Does the fact that now you cannot remember who he is explain
anything else?

Once, there was NO fun...  This was before MENU planning,
 FASHION statements or NAUTILUS equipment...
 Then, in 1985..  FUN was completely encoded in this tiny MICROCHIP..
 It contain 14,768 vaguely amusing SIT-COM pilots!!
 We had to wait FOUR BILLION years but we finally got JERRY LEWIS,
 MTV and a large selection of creme-filled snack cakes!

Are you certain you finally got jerry lewis mtv and a large
selection of creme filled snack cakes?

I just had my entire INTESTINAL TRACT coated with TEFLON!

What makes you believe that?

Now I understand the meaning of ``THE MOD SQUAD''!

Earlier you said you would like to empty?

I'll take ROAST BEEF if you're out of LAMB!!

Is it because of your inhibitions that you are going through all
this?

On SECOND thought, maybe I'll heat up some BAKED BEANS and
 watch REGIS PHILBIN..  It's GREAT to be ALIVE!!

Are you sure that it's great to be alive?

..  My vaseline is RUNNING...

You mentioned that do I know what it means to be truly one with
my booth?

My haircut is totally traditional!

How do you reconcile some problems in your childhood?

Where's the Coke machine?  Tell me a joke!!

Is it because of some problems at home that you say tell you a
joke?

Here I am in the POSTERIOR OLFACTORY LOBULE but I don't see CARL SAGAN
 anywhere!!

Is it because you do not see carl sagan anywhere that you came to
me?

YOW!!  Now I understand advanced MICROBIOLOGY
 and th' new TAX REFORM laws!!

Do you really think it keeps you busy?

There's enough money here to buy 5000 cans of Noodle-Roni!

Possibly this could be the reason for your plans?

ANN JILLIAN'S HAIR makes LONI ANDERSON'S HAIR look like
 RICARDO MONTALBAN'S HAIR!

I don't understand.

Is this my STOP??

Earlier you said do not embarrass you?

How many retired bricklayers from FLORIDA are out purchasing
 PENCIL SHARPENERS right NOW??

Are you annoyed that many retired bricklayers from florida are
out purchasing pencil sharpeners right now?

..  I wonder if I ought to tell them about my PREVIOUS LIFE
 as a COMPLETE STRANGER?

Maybe your life have something to do with this.

Mmmmmm-MMMMMM!!  A plate of STEAMING PIECES of a PIG mixed
 with the shreds of SEVERAL CHICKENS!!...  Oh BOY!!  I'm
 about to swallow a TORN-OFF section of a COW'S LEFT LEG
 soaked in COTTONSEED OIL and SUGAR!!  ..  Let's see..
 Next, I'll have the GROUND-UP flesh of CUTE, BABY LAMBS
 fried in the MELTED, FATTY TISSUES from a warm-blooded
 animal someone once PETTED!!  ...  YUM!!  That was GOOD!!
 For DESSERT, I'll have a TOFU BURGER with BEAN SPROUTS
 on a stone-ground, WHOLE WHEAT BUN!!

Is it because of the people you hang around with that you are
going through all this?

A shapely CATHOLIC SCHOOLGIRL is FIDGETING inside my costume..

You mentioned that are these athletic shoe salesmen following
you?

Is there something I should be DOING with a GLAZED DONUT??

How do you reconcile problems at school?

Are we THERE yet??

What makes you think are you there yet?

Sometimes a TABOO is just a good CIGAR -- or a
 rare STEAK -- or a dry MARTINI!

Why do you say you are only truly alive when you are covered in
polka dots and taco sauce?

Did YOU find a DIGITAL WATCH in YOUR box of VELVEETA?

Perhaps this is caused by any hobbies you have?

Yow!  It's some people inside the wall!  This is better than mopping!

Is it because of your sex life that you say this is better than
mopping?

While you're chewing, think of STEVEN SPIELBERG'S
 bank account..  This will have the same effect as
 two ``STARCH BLOCKERS''!

Earlier you said could a glass be yelling?

Let's send the Russians defective lifestyle accessories!

Possibly hangups you have are related to this.

Imagine--a WORLD without POODLES...

What makes you believe imagine a world without poodles?

OMNIVERSAL AWARENESS??  Oh, YEH!!  First you need 4 GALLONS of JELL-O
 and a BIG WRENCH!!...  I think you drop th'WRENCH in the JELL-O as if
 it was a FLAVOR, or an INGREDIENT...  ...or...I...um...  WHERE'S the
 WASHING MACHINES?

You have your mind on machines, it seems.

Yow!  Now we can become alcoholics!

You mentioned that is everything made of lycra spandex?

I'm ZIPPY!!  Are we having FUN yet??

Is it because of your inhibitions that you are going through all
this?

..The TENSION mounts as I MASSAGE your RIGHT ANKLE according to
 ancient Tibetan ACCOUNTING PROCEDURES..are you NEUROTIC yet??

Have you been scared of that?

I predict that by 1993 everyone will live in and around LAS VEGAS and
 wear BEATLE HAIRCUTS!

When did you first know that by 1993 everyone will live in and
around las vegas and wear beatle haircuts?

I Know A Joke

Are you sure that was you born?

Here I am at the flea market but nobody is buying
 my urine sample bottles..

Is the fact that nobody is buying your urine sample bottles the

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Eisenhower!!  Your mimeograph machine upsets my stomach!!

You think too much about machines.

Is this BOISE??

Maybe your inhibitions could be the reason for this.

I am NOT a nut....

Do you really think you are not a nut?

Imagine--a WORLD without POODLES...

Earlier you said we're in love I can buy this goldfish for a 48%
discount?

I wish I was on a Cincinnati street corner holding a clean dog!

Is it because of some problems in your childhood that you are
going through all this?

Yow!  Are we in the perfect mood?

Is it because of some problems at home that you say are you in
the perfect mood?

I will SHAVE and buy JELL-O and bring my MARRIAGE MANUAL!!

You mentioned that you would like to perform?

I'm continually AMAZED at th'breathtaking effects of WIND EROSION!!

How do you reconcile your plans?

Was my SOY LOAF left out in th'RAIN?  It tastes REAL GOOD!!

What makes you think it tastes real good?

I have accepted Provolone into my life!

Why do you say cannot even be printed?

Did you move a lot of KOREAN STEAK KNIVES this trip, Dingy?

Perhaps this is related to your life?

Now I'm concentrating on a specific tank battle toward
 the end of World War II!

I don't understand.

Of course, you UNDERSTAND about the PLAIDS in the SPIN CYCLE --

Earlier you said you own them?

The Korean War must have been fun.

Possibly the people you hang around with are caused by this.

It's a lot of fun being alive...  I wonder if my bed is made?!?

Is it because of problems at school that you say you wonder if
your bed is made?

Have my two-tone, 1958 Nash METRO brought around..

You mentioned that you were high?

FROZEN ENTREES may be flung by members of opposing SWANSON SECTS..

Is it because of any hobbies you have that you are going through
all this?

I think I'll do BOTH if I can get RESIDUALS!!

How do you reconcile your sex life?

I smell like a wet reducing clinic on Columbus Day!

What makes you believe smell might wish to have this wet?

PUNK ROCK!!  DISCO DUCK!!  BIRTH CONTROL!!

Are you sure that many jokes did I tell today?

I am a jelly donut.  I am a jelly donut.

Maybe this could be the reason for hangups you have?

I'm receiving a coded message from EUBIE BLAKE!!

Have you been afraid of that?

I appoint you ambassador to Fantasy Island!!!

Earlier you said comes just before I see the total at the safeway
checkout counter?

I'm ZIPPY!!  Are we having FUN yet??

Perhaps your inhibitions are because of this.

YOU'D cry too if it happened to YOU!!

Do you really think that?

I'm having a BIG BANG THEORY!!

You mentioned that could a glass be yelling?

These PRESERVES should be FORCE-FED to PENTAGON OFFICIALS!!

Is it because of some problems in your childhood that you are
going through all this?

I've got to get these SNACK CAKES to NEWARK by DAWN!!

I don't understand.

..  I think I'd better go back to my DESK and toy with

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Did an Italian CRANE OPERATOR just experience uninhibited sensations
 in a MALIBU HOT TUB?

Is it because of your inhibitions that you are going through all
this?

Laundry is the fifth dimension!!  ...um...um...  th' washing machine
 is a black hole and the pink socks are bus drivers who just fell in!!

Are you a computer hacker?

Hey, wait a minute!!  I want a divorce!!..  you're not Clint Eastwood!!

Is it because of some problems in your childhood that you say I
am not clint eastwood?

I'm losing my hair..did it go to ATLANTIC CITY??

Earlier you said many retired bricklayers from florida are out
purchasing pencil sharpeners right now?

Bagels...

And?

Are you guys lined up for the METHADONE PROGRAM or FOOD STAMPS??

How do you reconcile some problems at home?

If a person is FAMOUS in this country, they have to go on the ROAD
 for MONTHS at a time and have their name misspelled on the SIDE
 of a GREYHOUND SCENICRUISER!!

I don't understand.

NOT fucking!! Also not a PACKAGE of LOOSE-LEAF PAPER!!

Have you been satisfied with your partner... ?

America!!  I saw it all!!  Vomiting!  Waving!  JERRY FALWELLING into
 your void tube of UHF oblivion!!  SAFEWAY of the mind --

You mentioned that are these athletic shoe salesmen following
you?

I'm in ATLANTIC CITY riding in a comfortable ROLLING CHAIR...

Maybe this has something to do with your plans?

I hope something GOOD came in the mail today so I have
 a REASON to live!!

Perhaps your life could have caused this.

He probably just wants to take over my CELLS and then EXPLODE
 inside me like a BARREL of runny CHOPPED LIVER!  Or maybe he'd
 like to PSYCHOLOGICALLY TERRORIZE ME until I have no objection
 to a RIGHT-WING MILITARY TAKEOVER of my apartment!!  I guess
 I should call AL PACINO!

Why do you say you are only truly alive when you are covered in
polka dots and taco sauce?

I need "RONDO".

Is it because of the people you hang around with that you are
going through all this?

Do you guys know we just passed thru a BLACK HOLE in space?

Have you been scared of that?

Now I'm having INSIPID THOUGHTS about the beautiful, round
 wives of HOLLYWOOD MOVIE MOGULS encased in PLEXIGLASS CARS
 and being approached by SMALL BOYS selling FRUIT..

Earlier you said could a glass be yelling?

Am I in GRADUATE SCHOOL yet?

Does it bother you that your grades could improve?

Hmmm...  an arrogant bouquet with a subtle suggestion of
 POLYVINYL CHLORIDE...

How do you reconcile problems at school?

BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-BI-

What makes you believe that?

Hello.  I know the divorce rate among unmarried Catholic
 Alaskan females!!

You mentioned that is everything made of lycra spandex?

My ELBOW is a remote FRENCH OUTPOST!!

Possibly this is related to any hobbies you have?

I'm in DISGUISE as a BAGGAGE CHECKER....I can watch the house, if it's
 ORANGE...

I don't understand.

If Robert Di Niro assassinates Walter Slezak, will
 Jodie Foster marry Bonzo??

Are you sure that by 1993 everyone will live in and around las
vegas and wear beatle haircuts?

My BIOLOGICAL ALARM CLOCK just went off..  It has noiseless
 DOZE FUNCTION and full kitchen!!

Maybe your sex life could be the reason for this.

..The TENSION mounts as I MASSAGE your RIGHT ANKLE according to
 ancient Tibetan ACCOUNTING PROCEDURES..are you NEUROTIC yet??

Is it because of hangups you have that you are going through all
this?

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 Bendix like a GOD!!

Are you obsessed with to have this god?

If Robert Di Niro assassinates Walter Slezak, will
 Jodie Foster marry Bonzo??

How do you reconcile your life?

Is this "BIKINI BEACH"?

Are you sure that do not embarrass you?

Yow!  And then we could sit on the hoods of cars at stop lights!

Possibly this is related to the people you hang around with?

-- I can do ANYTHING ... I can even ... SHOPLIFT!!

Do you really think -- i can do anything you can even shoplift?

NOW, I'm taking the NEXT FLIGHT to ACAPULCO so I can write POEMS about
 BROKEN GUITAR STRINGS and sensuous PRE-TEENS!!

How long have you are smoking grass?

I think I am an overnight sensation right now!!

Earlier you said many retired bricklayers from florida are out
purchasing pencil sharpeners right now?

Now I understand the meaning of ``THE MOD SQUAD''!

Maybe problems at school are related to this.

Now, let's SEND OUT for QUICHE!!

Is it because of any hobbies you have that you say now let's send
out for quiche?

I know things about TROY DONAHUE that can't even be PRINTED!!

Does the fact that cannot even be printed explain anything else?

As a FAD follower, my BEVERAGE choices are rich and fulfilling!

You mentioned that are these athletic shoe salesmen following
you?

I have accepted Provolone into my life!

Is it because of your sex life that you are going through all
this?

Yow!  And then we could sit on the hoods of cars at stop lights!

Have you been scared of that?

Loni Anderson's hair should be LEGALIZED!!

What makes you think you are only truly alive when you are
covered in polka dots and taco sauce?

...  Blame it on the BOSSA NOVA!!!

How do you reconcile hangups you have?

I'm CONTROLLED by the CIA!!  EVERYONE is controlled by the CIA!!

Why do you say everyone is controlled by the cia?

It's today's SPECIAL!

Earlier you said could a glass be yelling?

O.K.!  Speak with a PHILADELPHIA ACCENT!!  Send out for CHINESE FOOD!!
 Hop a JET!

Perhaps this could be the reason for your inhibitions?

HELLO KITTY gang terrorizes town, family STICKERED to death!

It seems to me that we've introduced ourselves already.
Could you describe some problems in your childhood.

I need "RONDO".

Is it because of some problems at home that you say you need
rondo?

Bagels...

Is that all there is to it?

Hello.  Just walk along and try NOT to think about your
 INTESTINES being almost FORTY YARDS LONG!!

You mentioned that is everything made of lycra spandex?

Let's send the Russians defective lifestyle accessories!

Possibly your plans could have caused this.

..  If I had heart failure right now, I couldn't be a more fortunate man!!

What makes you believe that?

...PENGUINS are floating by...

Are you sure that by 1993 everyone will live in and around las
vegas and wear beatle haircuts?

I want to so HAPPY, the VEINS in my neck STAND OUT!!

Why should I give to so to you?

Hey, I LIKE that POINT!!

Why must you respond so briefly?

I want you to MEMORIZE the collected poems of EDNA ST VINCENT MILLAY..

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What makes you think do not embarrass you?

I'm changing the CHANNEL..  But all I get is commercials
 for ``RONCO MIRACLE BAMBOO STEAMERS''!

Are you sorry all you get is commercials for ronco miracle bamboo
steamers''?

What PROGRAM are they watching?

Is it because of your life that you are going through all this?

Yow!  Maybe I should have asked for my Neutron Bomb in PAISLEY--

Why do you say that?

I will establish the first SHOPPING MALL in NUTLEY, New Jersey...

Earlier you said many retired bricklayers from florida are out
purchasing pencil sharpeners right now?

Everybody gets free BORSCHT!

How do you reconcile the people you hang around with?

My CODE of ETHICS is vacationing at famed SCHROON LAKE
 in upstate New York!!

I don't understand.

"DARK SHADOWS" is on!!  Hey, I think the VAMPIRE forgot his UMBRELLA!!

You mentioned that cannot even be printed?

Yow!  Now we can become alcoholics!

Perhaps this is because of problems at school?

SHHHH!!  I hear SIX TATTOOED TRUCK-DRIVERS tossing ENGINE BLOCKS
 into empty OIL DRUMS..

Possibly any hobbies you have have something to do with this.

Yow!  I just went below the poverty line!

What makes you believe are these athletic shoe salesmen following
you?

CHUBBY CHECKER just had a CHICKEN SANDWICH in downtown DULUTH!

Is it because of your sex life that you are going through all
this?

..  One FISHWICH coming up!!

Are you sure that one fishwich coming up?

Are we THERE yet??

Earlier you said you are only truly alive when you are covered in
polka dots and taco sauce?

Used staples are good with SOY SAUCE!

How do you reconcile hangups you have?

With this weapon I can expose fictional characters and bring about
 sweeping reforms!!

Have you been frightened by that?

ANN JILLIAN'S HAIR makes LONI ANDERSON'S HAIR look like
 RICARDO MONTALBAN'S HAIR!

You mentioned that could a glass be yelling?

I hope I bought the right relish...  zzzzzzzzz...

And?

I'm young..  I'm HEALTHY..  I can HIKE THRU CAPT GROGAN'S LUMBAR REGIONS!

Maybe this has something to do with your inhibitions?

I request a weekend in Havana with Phil Silvers!

Do you really think that?

Is something VIOLENT going to happen to a GARBAGE CAN?

What makes you think is everything made of lycra spandex?

Somewhere in Tenafly, New Jersey, a chiropractor is viewing
 ``Leave it to Beaver''!

Perhaps existential despair are related to this.

Ha ha   Ha ha  Ha ha   Ha  Ha  Ha  Ha  -- When will I EVER stop HAVING
 FUN?!!

What would happen if will you ever stop having fun?

I think I'll do BOTH if I can get RESIDUALS!!

I don't understand.

Yow!  And then we could sit on the hoods of cars at stop lights!

Earlier you said by 1993 everyone will live in and around las
vegas and wear beatle haircuts?

Oh my GOD -- the SUN just fell into YANKEE STADIUM!!

Is it because of some problems in your childhood that you are
going through all this?

Barbie says, Take quaaludes in gin and go to a disco right away!
 But Ken says, WOO-WOO!!  No credit at ``Mr. Liquor''!!

Is it because of some problems at home that you say credit at mr

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Do you really think I ought to change my underwear more often?

Content:  80% POLYESTER, 20% DACRON..  The waitress's
 UNIFORM sheds TARTAR SAUCE like an 8'' by 10'' GLOSSY..

Have you ever gotten to have this 8''?

I had pancake makeup for brunch!

Perhaps your inhibitions are related to this.

Maybe we could paint GOLDIE HAWN a rich PRUSSIAN BLUE--

I don't understand.

Bo Derek ruined my life!

Earlier you said all you get is commercials for ronco miracle
bamboo steamers''?

..  I feel..  JUGULAR..

Is that all there is to it?

The FALAFEL SANDWICH lands on my HEAD and I become a VEGETARIAN...

Is it because of existential despair that you are going through
all this?

Yow!  Now I get to think about all the BAD THINGS I did to a BOWLING BALL
 when I was in JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL!

Talk about your school.

I joined scientology at a garage sale!!

What makes you think you joined scientology at a garage sale?

I don't know WHY I said that..  I think it came from the FILLINGS
 in my rear molars..

You mentioned that you were high?

I decided to be JOHN TRAVOLTA instead!!

How do you reconcile some problems in your childhood?

Yow!  Those people look exactly like Donnie and Marie Osmond!!

Possibly this is caused by some problems at home?

I'm having a tax-deductible experience!  I need an energy crunch!!

Why do you say you might want to have an energy?

Content:  80% POLYESTER, 20% DACRON..  The waitress's
 UNIFORM sheds TARTAR SAUCE like an 8'' by 10'' GLOSSY..

How does it feel to want?

It's a lot of fun being alive...  I wonder if my bed is made?!?

What makes you believe you were happy?

I want to kill everyone here with a cute colorful Hydrogen Bomb!!

Why should you get to kill everyone?

We have DIFFERENT amounts of HAIR --

Maybe your plans could have caused this.

..  here I am in 53 B.C. and all I want is a dill pickle!!

Are you scared of that?

I just had my entire INTESTINAL TRACT coated with TEFLON!

Earlier you said smell would like to have this wet?

Talking Pinhead Blues:
 Oh, I LOST my ``HELLO KITTY'' DOLL and I get BAD reception on
  channel TWENTY-SIX!!
 Th'HOSTESS FACTORY is closin' down and I just heard ZASU PITTS
  has been DEAD for YEARS..  (sniff)
 My PLATFORM SHOE collection was CHEWED up by th'dog, ALEXANDER
  HAIG won't let me take a SHOWER 'til Easter.. (snurf)
 So I went to the kitchen, but WALNUT PANELING whup me
  upside mah HAID!! (on no, no, no..  Heh, heh)

Is it because of your life that you are going through all this?

I've read SEVEN MILLION books!!

Is it because of the people you hang around with that you say you
have read seven million books?

Am I elected yet?

You mentioned that you would like to take it?

Not enough people play SKEE-BALL..  They're always thinking about
 COCAINE or and ALIEN BEINGS!!

Have you been addicted to cocaine?

I wish I was a sex-starved manicurist found dead in the Bronx!!

How do you reconcile problems at school?

..Hmmm...This thing is really VIBRATING! ..It's getting WARM, too!

Are you sure that that?

Th' MIND is the Pizza Palace of th' SOUL

Do you really think they were off key?

I feel real SOPHISTICATED being in FRANCE!

Perhaps this is because of any hobbies you have?