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Jack Bauer does not yield when he turns right on red.
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The Bird Flu almost made it to the United States. Luckily Jack Bauer was there to shoot and kill it. 
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Someone once said "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuckk the prom queen" Jack fucked the prom queen. Twice.
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Jack Bauer's Rice Krispies make no noise. Snap, Crackle and Pop were too noisy for him to complete his breakfast mission.
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The only time we'd ever have to fear the French Army is if Jack Bauer became a French Citizen.
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Jack Bauer knows "How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days". He kills them.
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Audrey had a visible reaction when she learned that Jack was still alive: Orgasm. Multiple.
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Jack Bauer can win the world series of poker without being dealt a hand.
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Jack Bauer once shot a Terrorist plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!" 
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Jack Bauer forced Mother Theresa to confess to several crimes.
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Jack Bauer doesn’t sweat, sweat sweats Jack Bauer.
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McDonalds does not love to see Jack Bauer smile.
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Arnold Schwarzenegger thought he could take Jack Bauer in a fight. He ended up pregnant and they made a shitty movie about it.
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Jack Bauer once wiped out an entire Chinese restaurant because he thought there was a bomb in his fortune cookie.
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Jack Bauer didn't temporarily die from being tortured, he was getting bored of the terrorists antics and decided to take a nap before killing them.
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The real reason women love Jack Bauer:  He can find the Clitoris.  Always.
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It took this website's admin up to a week to post this fact.  Jack Bauer would've had it up in 24 hours.
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Jack Bauer once used a retard to capture the most wanted terrorist and take down three of his subordinates.

...no, seriously, he did.
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When CTU didn't have a hacksaw per his request, Jack used his teeth to cut through the spinal cord of a suspect.
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Jack Bauer was unhappy because God didn't let Jack into heaven for all his sins but cheered up after he was able to eternally torture Nina, Drazen and Marwan in hell.
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Only Jack Bauer knows whats going to happen at the end of Day 5.  In order to keep it a secret, he killed Keifer Sutherland.
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Jack Bauer is the reason Enrique Iglesias no longer has that thing on his face. Jack Bauer fucking hates moles.
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Black holes aren't black holes. Thats the gravitational pull from Jack Bauer's Balls. 
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When car pooling with Jack, never yell shotgun.
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Jack Bauer's preferred method of killing terrorists is actually just pointing his gun in the general direction he wants to shoot and using his sheer force of will to realign time and space so that the bullet from the gun is now in the terrorist. Trig...
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Jack Bauer was disqualified of Big Brother because he was torturing the other participants. 
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When Jack Bauer sees a terrorist with half a head, he stops laughing and reloads.
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Everytime someone gets their ass kicked, Jack Bauer gets a royalty.
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If Jack Bauer wants his bullets to kill Superman, his bullets will kill Superman.
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The creators of the 007 movies offered Keifer Sutherland a position as the new James Bond. They then re-named the movie to, "0024."
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Now Curtis knows what happens when you ask Jack Bauer personal questions.
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Jack Bauer Syndrome isn't an illness, it's a cause of death.
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Jack Bauer keeps a gun in his couch.  You don't want to know what he keeps in his La-Z-Boy.
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Jack Bauer once hit two home runs on the same pitch.
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Jack Bauer once ate Froot Loops and was told to follow his nose. He ended up finding 40 terrorists in an abandoned warehouse.
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In the shadows, a team of CIA specialists follow Jack Bauer at all times, ready to collect his tears for chemical warfare production.
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In Season 5 episode 5. When Jack Bauer was attacked by the assassin, he didn't crack Jack Bauer's rib. Jack Bauer's rib cracked the assassin's fist.
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Jack Bauer never parks in handicap parking spots. He does however make sure that there are plenty of crippled people to use them.
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When bad things happen to good people, its probably fate.  When bad things happen to bad people, it’s probably Jack Bauer.
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In Soviet Russia, bread stands in line for Jack Bauer.
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Insurance applications are now required by law to ask: "Are you a friend of Jack Bauer?"
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When God said “Let there be light,” Jack Bauer said “Say please.”
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Jack Bauer tortured every member of the ACLU until they revealed the location of every terrorist cell in the U.S.
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Jack Bauer always hits above 16 in Blackjack.
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Jack Bauer always gets Blackjack in Vegas. Always. 
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RIP Edgar

If you see this give it a 10.

Just cuz it's what Edgar would have wanted.   :( 
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It was not a meteor impact that killed the dinosaurs, it was actually the result of Jack Bauer arm-wrestling Chuck Norris.
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Jack Bauer has only cried once, and that was because he ran out of asses to kick.
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The number one cause of death in America is heart disease.  The number one cause of heart disease is fear of Jack Bauer.
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Richard Hellar came out of the closet not because he was gay but because Jack was in there.
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Jack Bauer attracts terrorists like his daughter attracts psychos and mountain lions.
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Whenever Jack Bauer's cars run out of gas, he simply does one of two things: either hotwires another person's car or points a gun at another person and takes it. Basically he is the Federal Agent equivalent of "Grand Theft Auto". 
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When Tony Montana said, 'Say Hello to my little friend,' he was talking about Jack Bauer.
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Jack Bauer was able to give Jenna Jameson an orgasm.
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On Jack Bauer's Tax Returns, he has to claim the entire world as his dependents.
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Jack Bauer pushed Humpty Dumpty off the wall.
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In grade school, young Jack Bauer once shot a kid while going for the final remaining seat in "Musical Chairs".
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On Sunday mornings, Jack skips church.  God comes to his house instead.