view release on metacpan or  search on metacpan

fortune/jackbauer  view on Meta::CPAN

A man once said "Give me liberty or give me death." Jack Bauer gave him death.
%
Jack Bauer signs his autograph with bullets.  So don't ask him to sign any part of your body.
%
The highest possible score in a perfect game of bowling is 300. Jack Bauer once bowled and got 600... just because he can. 
%
Only Jack Bauer can prevent forest fires.
%
While being ‘put under’ in the hospital, Jack Bauer can count backwards from 100 every time.  This annoys the doctors.
%
There are two certainties for everyone in life, death and taxes. For Jack Bauer, there's only one certainty. And that's why he hired a good accountant.
%
Time waits for no man. Except Jack Bauer.
%
Jack Bauer never shaves; he shoots himself in the face every morning so his facial hair doesn't get the wrong idea.
%
Ford is doing better than GM because Jack Bauer drives a Ford Expedition. Not a Chevy Suburban.
%
Radiation needs a Jack Bauer suit.
%
Jack Bauer doesn't need a kevlar vest to stop bullets. That's what key witnesses are for.